Adventures in Babysitting

[pugsmuggler]

It was uncharacteristically early when Garamond decided to stop by Calibri’s lab. The installment was still relatively new to the first circle’s queen ship. The counters were still glossy-tiled and free of chemical burns, the utensils all shiny and unused, and while it accommodated for plenty more than just Calibri’s research, no one really had the nerve to go in there with it being consistently occupied by the circle’s finest poisons expert — No one except for Garamond. From Garamond’s perspective, Calibri had acclimated himself to life on the ship quite well, and handled his responsibilities aptly. This particular morning, however, Garamond had decided to hand Calibri a responsibility that extended slightly beyond what Calibri had signed on for.

Ten-year-old son at his side, Garamond let himself through the laboratory doors and into the. He found Calibri, after a brief trip around the countertops, curled up asleep underneath a desk. Calibri was equipped with a stylus and notebook in hand as if he had fallen asleep scrawling notes. Garamond, not visibly surprised by the scenario, crouched down to Calibri’s level, perching himself on the toes of his loafers.

“Ah, there you are,” Garamond announced himself. “I had a favor to ask.”

Comments

[kobacake]

Despite that touching Calibri was the last thing he wanted to do ten minutes ago, Danny, surprisingly enough, allowed Calibri to lead him across the room without protest. Perhaps he'd expended all his energy, or maybe in admitting they didn't understand each other, they had come to some sort of odd understanding after all. He pulled himself onto one of the high stools at the lab table once Calibri set down the tray and pulled off the metal lid. Underneath was a short stack of pancakes (the top most of which was adorned with various berries, whipped cream, and chocolate arranged to look like a smiley face), a small bowl of fruit, and a couple of links of Quiggailian boar sausage.

Danny's mood seemed to brighten considerably once he saw the meal and he took no time before he started digging in. This was clearly a breakfast of champions, after all.

[tactician]

Adopting a mild look of almost-horror at the speed to which Danny ingested his sustenance (that couldn't have been very good for his small digestive track), Calibri quickly recovered and began to lift covers to inspect his own meal. For as flighty as Garamond always seemed in his company, the man clearly knew what he was doing at all times.

Whereas Danny's breakfast was perfectly cooked to his tastes, Calibri's, too, was one tailored exactly for the kind of person who never quite ate well and rarely enough in favor of longer work hours. There was a bowl of what seemed to be thick, slightly-sweetened oatmeal cooked in milk, a humble-looking plate of scrambled eggs, made fluffier with milk, and a tall glass of cold, pure white mi-...

There certainly was a lot of that stuff. (But surely it had nothing to do with all of Garamond's comments about his lack of growth. Surely.)

"Don't eat so fast, or you'll choke and suffocate and die," Calibri commented idly as he picked up his spoon.

[kobacake]

Danny stopped mid-chew, frozen with his fork still in his mouth, as he heard the words "choke" and "suffocate" and "die." He continued his meal much more slowly after that, making sure to properly chew and swallow each bite before taking another. The meal continued in silence for the most part, but when he was just about finished (Really, how could such a small boy eat so much? He'd grow up big and strong for sure.) he turned to Calibri with a question. "Do you have a girlfriend?"

DANNY

[tactician]

Calibri, still chewing, quirked a brow. He waited until he had swallowed before answering simply, "No."

His eyes narrowed. "I thought human males usually hit the onslaught of hormonal maturity before they were concerned with such things."

CALIBRI.

[kobacake]

"Why not?" Danny asked, as he stuffed a bite of pancakes into his mouth. He ignored the second half of what Calibri said (there were way too many unfamiliar words in there). Once he'd swallowed, he pointed his clean fork at Calibri. "You're old right? Shouldn't you have one?"

[tactician]

Danny's interest in his (lack of) love life was somewhat perplexing. What interest could this possibly hold to the child?

"I left my planet before a mating candidate meeting was arranged for me."

[kobacake]

"So?" Danny furrowed his brows, dropping his hand with a shrug. Really now, all of this was common sense, wasn't it? Everyone knew that people were supposed to date when they got old. If there was anything TV taught him, it was that. "Why don't you just meet someone here?"

[tactician]

Calibri looked at Danny as if the answer was obvious. "Because I'm working."

[kobacake]

"Why would you choose work over having a girlfriend?" Danny looked at Calibri like he was crazy.

[tactician]

They continued to stare at each other over their breakfasts.

"Why would you choose a companion over a means to sustain yourself?"

[kobacake]

"If you have love you don't need anything else!" Either Danny was the least materialistic 10-year-old in the world, or he was quoting something he'd heard on TV. Obviously it was the latter. He'd probably be quite upset if someone took his things.

[tactician]

Calibri looked mortally offended.

"That is the most incorrect statement I have ever heard."

[kobacake]

Danny rolled his eyes, turning back to his last few bites of pancakes. "You're so dumb!"

[tactician]

"Excuse me?"

uh oh you've done it now danny

[kobacake]

Placing the last bite of his breakfast into his mouth, he set down his fork and pushed the tray away. He narrowed an eye like he wasn't sure why Calibri didn't understand and repeated, "You're dumb."

hey koba do you want to see gen2 lockweiler

[tactician]

"And against what standard are you basing that?" Calibri said, stirring his spoon around his oatmeal without really eating from it. Considering he fastidiously avoided idle or nervous habits with a vengeance (it was just a waste of energy), it was as clear an indication as any as to how he felt about Danny's sudden declaration.

SCREAMS WAS THAT A REAL QUESTION SHOW ME

[kobacake]

"Cause you dont like girls and you like weird stuff." Danny said as if the answer was obvious.

[tactician]

Calibri looked at Danny as if it were anything but.

"The gauge of one's interest in the female race is not a test of intelligence. Neither is the measure one's interest in unconventional fields like poisons," he sniffed, poking around his eggs with a fork now. They were done easy-over, so the semi-raw yolk still had a chance of developing Enterobacteriaceae bacteria, he noted. "There are plenty of people who are experts in their field who, presumably, have no interests in poisons, and have no interests in women."

calibri is this a sensitive issue for you

[kobacake]

Danny just stared at Calibri during his explanation, placing his chin in his hands. "I... guess? But don't you wanna be a dad someday?"

[tactician]

Calibri glanced pointedly at Danny.

After a moment, he turned back to his food. The yolks were making a bloody mess all over his plate now and, despite what a fastidiously tidy person he tended to be, Calibri seemed to take no mind in smearing around the carnage with the egg whites. "Right now, my career is more important than the proliferation of my genetic brand for evolutionary purposes."

[kobacake]

"I'm gonna be an awesome dad someday." Danny straightened up again, tilting his chin up with a hint of pride. "Just like Boss. He's the best."

[tactician]

Behind his fork, Calibri's mouth quirked into a barely-there smile, even as he kept his eyes on his finely and evenly diced scrambled eggs. "He is a good father," he agreed quietly, sounding almost fond. Calibri lifted his eyes to Danny. "You would do well in emulating him."

Of course, he had to ruin that a moment later with a thoughtful tilt of his head. "But I estimate you have at least two years before you are even physically capable of producing offspring."

[kobacake]

Danny nodded towards Calibri as he agreed. Boss was so great, even weird people like Calibri could understand. Suddenly he went wide-eyed and pointed at Calibri's face, looking almost alarmed. "WHOA! You smiled!!"

[tactician]

Consequently, Calibri frowned. "Is there something wrong with that?"

[kobacake]

"I've never seen you smile before." This wasn't completely true. He'd seen Calibri smile plenty of times, but those smiles were normally accompanied by gleaming glasses lenses and eerie laughter and a menacing aura. This was the first time he'd seen a happy, normal person smile on Calibri's face, no matter how small it'd been. "It almost made you look not evil."